Archived Feghoots
1 - 50
51 - 100
101 - 150
151 - 200
201 - 250
251 - 300
301 - 350
351 - 400
401 - 450
451 - 500
501 - 550
551 - 600
601 - 650
651 - 700
701 - 750
751 - 800
801 - 850
851 - 900
901 - 950
951 - 1000
1001 - 1050
1051 - 1100
1101 - 1150
1151 - 1200
1201 - 1250
1251 - 1300
1301 - 1350
1351 - 1400
1401 - 1450
1451 - 1500
1501 - 1550
1551 - 1600
1601 - 1650
1651 - 1700
1701 - 1750
1751 - 1800
1801 - 1851
1851 - 1900
1901 - 1950
1951 - 2000
2001 - 2050
Short Takes
This collection comes from Ms. Scarlett, my pun mistdress. For some reason,she says I deserve it. "Something old, something new. . ." Some we've seen before.
Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.
A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve you, but don't start anything."
Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was a salted.
A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says, "A beer please, and one for the road!"
"Doc, I can't stop singing 'The Green, Green Grass of Home.'"
"That sounds like the Tom Jones Syndrome."
"Is it common?"
" Well, It's Not Unusual."
Two cows are standing next to each other in a field.
Daisy says to Dolly, "I was artificially inseminated this morning."
"I don't believe you," says Dolly.
"It's true, no bull!" exclaims Daisy.
An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids are nothing to look at, either.
I tried to buy some camouflage trousers the other day, but I couldn't find any.
I went to a seafood disco last week...and pulled a mussel.
What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.
Two termites walk into a bar. One asks, "Is the bar tender here?"
A vulture boards an airplane, carrying two dead raccoons. The stewardess looks at him and says, "I'm sorry, sir, only one carrion allowed per passenger."
Two fish bump into a concrete wall. The one turns to the other and says, "Dam!".
Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft. Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.
Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says, "I've lost my electron."
The other says, "Are you sure?"
The first replies, "Yes, I'm positive."
Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail -- and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him . . . . . A super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis!
And finally, there was the person who sent ten different puns to her friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did.
Served by Austin Web Publishing, Inc.
Sponsored by search engine marketing firm Apogee Search, providers of world class paid search advertising management and search engine optimization services. Apogee Search is a division of internet marketing firm Leads Customers Growth.
Designed and maintained by Brian Combs (info@briancombs.net).
(c) 1996-2006 Alan B.
& Brian P. Combs,
All Rights Reserved