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It's the End of the World as They Know It...
This is from Randall Woodman on the groaners listserv.
When the end of the world arrives how will the media report it?
USA Today:
WE'RE DEAD
The Wall Street Journal:
DOW JONES PLUMMETS AS WORLD ENDS
National Enquirer:
O.J. AND NICOLE, TOGETHER AGAIN
Playboy:
GIRLS OF THE APOCALYPSE
Microsoft Systems Journal:
APPLE LOSES MARKET SHARE
Victoria's Secret Catalog:
OUR FINAL SALE
Sports Illustrated:
GAME OVER
Wired:
THE LAST NEW THING
Rolling Stone:
THE GRATEFUL DEAD REUNION TOUR
Readers Digest:
'BYE
Discover Magazine:
HOW WILL THE EXTINCTION OF ALL LIFE AS WE KNOW IT
AFFECT THE WAY WE VIEW THE COSMOS?
TV Guide:
DEATH AND DAMNATION: NIELSON RATINGS SOAR!
Lady's Home Journal:
LOSE 10 LBS BY JUDGEMENT DAY WITH OUR NEW "ARMAGEDDON" DIET!
America Online:
SYSTEM TEMPORARILY DOWN. TRY CALLING BACK IN 15 MINUTES.
Inc. magazine:
TEN WAYS YOU CAN PROFIT FROM THE APOCALYPSE
Microsoft's Web Site:
IF YOU DIDN'T EXPERIENCE THE RAPTURE, DOWNLOAD SOFTWARE
PATCH RAPT777.EXE.
Sun:
ARMAGEDDON TOLERANT SOFTWARE NOW AVAILABLE!
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